The Year is not over, Neither are you

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

I am still amazed at how fast the year is going. Just the other day, we were busy with fireworks, shouting "Happy New Year," and some even dared to say how this was their year. Oh, the resolutions? How are we doing with the gym and keeping fit and leaving that toxic partner, or did you become the toxic one? 

I just want you to pause, and while doing a mid-year audit report, I want you to breathe. I am not an advocate of toxic positivity, so at this point scream if you need to, shed those tears if you can, mourn that illusion you had, and let me cook. 

Many people are not grieving a person or a job. They are grieving the version of themselves they thought they would be by now. The person who would have ticked off the 2026 list. Going back to school and getting that degree. The thriving business, but you realized the journey to Singapore is for the chosen few. The healed heart, but you went back to the 'market' only to realize you had been taken to the onions section—premium tears and bubbles. The healthy saving accounts, and alas, the saving is now saving you. The breakthrough and certainty. The plan you were convinced God had already approved. 

 

Sometimes grief will look like staring at a goal you set in January and quietly removing the deadline. Other times grief will look like deleting screenshots of apartments you were sure you would move into by now. And other days it looks like laughing when someone asks, "How is that project going?" because crying in public is generally frowned upon. You know that laughter of a guy who has been rejected by their talking stage but will not admit it. That painful laughter. 

Life has a funny way of humbling us. One minute you are creating a vision board and choosing your word for the year. The next minute life is looking at your plans and saying, "That's cute."

But relax; before you start beating yourself up, can we talk about something else?

The wins. The small, unimpressive, unphotogenic wins. The fact that you are still here, you are doing well breathing in and out. You got out of bed when some mornings felt heavier than usual. You made it through difficult conversations. The fact you started therapy or went back to it or even just considered it. There are so many wins, like you paid a bill, went for a walk, drank water, set a boundary, and apologized, and you did not die; you started over. 

These things may not have made it to LinkedIn, but they still count. LinkedIn is one place that can make you feel like you have done nothing with every post popping up. You get to read this every time: "It has been a while, but I want to update that I started a new position." All you can do is post, 'I want to update that I have become a father and my new responsibilities will be speaking in tongues, buying diapers, and being an environmental officer in charge of disposing of diapers." 

You know why they count, it is because life is not lived in major milestones alone. It is lived on ordinary Mondays when you need an extra day to recover from the weekend and nobody is clapping for you. 

And while we are looking at key performance indicators, can we stop speaking to ourselves like disappointed managers conducting a performance review? You are a human being. Not a machine. Not a quarterly report. Not a productivity app.

Some of us are carrying losses nobody can see. Others are navigating transitions they never planned for. Some are rebuilding entire parts of their lives while still showing up every day pretending everything is fine. Give yourself some grace, not excuses. Extending grace to oneself is what will normalize us crying and bouncing back. Not because crying is weakness, but because pretending not to feel anything is exhausting.

Cry if you need to, spend a day questioning everything, eat the ice cream, and write the angry journal entry.

Take the long walk, have the conversation with God. Then get up.

Not because the pain magically disappeared, but because life keeps moving and so can you.

One of the most underrated skills in life is learning how to recover and bounce back. It is not about avoiding failure and disappointment. It is recovering and learning to say, "Well, that was unfortunate," and trying again anyway.

The people who thrive are not necessarily the people who never fall apart.

Often they are the people who learn how to put themselves back together a little faster each time.

So as we step into the second half of the year, I hope you release the pressure to have everything figured out.

Celebrate what went right.

Acknowledge what did not.

Mourn what needs mourning.

Learn what needs learning.

And remember that a delayed timeline is not the same thing as a failed life.

The year is not over.

Neither are you.