Little Foxes

Photo by Qijin Xu on Unsplash

I must have stepped on a thorn a few days ago while walking home. At first, I thought I had dealt with it, but as days went by, every step reminded me that something was still lodged inside. For a moment, I wanted to blame it on age because it is my birthday month but wait a minute I am just a child and I am just graduating to being a ‘mwana youthi.’ The pain kept increasing and I knew it was time to deal with it and as we can all imagine, it was just a small part that was making my life unbearable.  As someone who enjoys sharing lessons, this was a good opportunity to share some wisdom with my descendants. This moment reminded me of a preaching I heard when I was young I believe from Pastor Mickey,  ‘The Little Foxes.’ My nephew was quick to remind me of sharing this in my blog. Here I am, doing just that. 

Scripture in Song of Solomon 2: 15 talks about the little foxes that spoil the vineyard. Most of us imagine that it is the grand things that wreck our lives but it is the little things with a compound effect that break us, wreck us and finish us. It is the little tiny things we put off, it is the red flag that we turn pink. Imagine the ships, as big as they are they are controlled by a small rudder. Our lives can be derailed by what seems so minor but when left unchecked it can be destructive.

That affair that you are in did not start as a full blown affair, it started with a small and what we call ‘innocent’ flirting. You were warned but you said it was the in thing. That relationship failed when you refused to take feedback and blamed it on, ‘This is who I am. This is how I was raised.’ The silent treatment that you cave to has now made you lose a family.

 

It is harmless when you miss a day in prayers but it is now ten years down the line and you feel dry and empty. You cannot connect with your God because well, you do not know how to turn back.

Can we talk about our own dreams, calling and purpose in life. We have procrastinated, we are bitter with life experiences and we have refused to confront them. Some of you are walking in bitterness that it has made you grow old and wrinkled for your age. It has made you jealous of others’ progress but you see, it was a just a small bitterness from the first breakup, the first job loss but you have carried it for decades.

You have postponed hard conversations and let fear dictate your daily choices. Do you think that the mega corruption we are seeing started with billions? No, it started with fifty bob but we normalized it. It is the turning a blind eye to corruption since it is not your case until you need to access the services. It is the harmless scroll that leaves you empty chasing to keep up with everyone on social media and you now hold a PhD in consumerism. It is the continuous skipping family dinners that make the dinner table empty and widen the family gap. It is that small puff that promises calm but births addiction.

Well, they feel so small until they start to weaken the vineyard.

I’ve seen a trend on TikTok: “locking it in for the ember months.” People are locking in fitness, finances, soft life goals, relationships, and more. But I hope part of locking it in also means allowing yourself to deal with the little foxes.

Because what’s the point of securing the bag if corruption still leaks through the seams?

Or curating the perfect lifestyle online while quietly holding a PhD in consumerism?

Locking it in should mean locking out the small habits and compromises that erode us silently. This is the beginning.

I will not sit and lie to you that I am a perfect human and live in heaven only to drop in the morning for work, I am just but a chief sinner. But, just as I had to sit and deal with that thorn, we all need to pause and examine our lives. What are those little foxes that are hiding because, oh boy, those little foxes can hide. What are we tolerating but is slowly eating our peace, joy and growth?

We all have our little foxes, but good thing the vineyard can blossom again. It begins with honest and tough conversations, intentionality and prayers and those foxes can be caught early enough without causing damage.

For how long would I have survived stepping on the thorn? What if it led to something big and hazardous? And as a recovering over thinker, of course my mind went there- what if it began rotting inside? What if my beautiful legs got swollen and I had to be put on bed-rest.  I hope you catch the little foxes before they turn into wolves. May today be the day you find the courage to start. 

Happy New Month