The Healing

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash

Now that you know, be different. The pressure of awakening is the realization that you cannot continue living like you do. It is the realization that you are the cycle breaker in the family and you need you. It is the realization that you are disrupting a pattern, recognizing your own dysfunctionality and you no longer want to fit in. 

I will be honest with you. It is not easy going back and sitting with your pain but that is the beginning of liberation. You cannot fix it if you cannot understand it. The truth is you have the most work to do for yourself and on yourself. 

Until you are willing to heal, you cannot heal. This is the first step. Most of you have already normalized your unhealthy lives and see it as okay. I have heard people say, 'this is how we are, we cannot change.' STOP. That is not how you are, that is how you were conditioned, that is your defense mechanism. 

That is why there is a need to unlearn, relearn and learn. Therapy is key. The investment made on self is never a waste. Invest in you. This will actually be the motivating factor. In my line of work, I have found those who have purposed to be in therapy, make tremendous progress. Allow yourself to heal through the process. Stop giving yourself deadlines that you must have healed by a certain date or heal like someone else. Why? Because the healing journey is different for different people. Trauma and socialization are different for all of us. Some of us have to heal from numerous sexual abuse from caregivers, some need to heal from negative remarks, others need to heal using sex as a defense mechanism. Some need to heal from the shouting and the trauma inflicted. We all are healing. It is your journey. Heal at your own pace. 

In the process of therapy, you realize you need to forgive yourself for thinking something is wrong with you. You let go of the negative patterns and you begin learning. 

I also realized that breaking the cycle takes courage, but it needs you. In simpler terms, this is a journey you might have to go solo. Why? Because of our normalization, we think everything is okay and are fixated on that. 

Stop harboring self-limiting beliefs. You were not born a failure. What happened to you made you believe and think something is wrong with you. 

Live, Love, Laugh. 

Pick that phone, seek help and meet with your therapist. The beginning of your safe space. 

I cannot wait to see you walking towards the person you were meant to be, living in your purpose and letting go of the baggage that you were not supposed to carry. I cannot wait for you to see how you are beautiful and worth it. Walk the journey. Heal yourself and the next generation